2012

It's a brand new year, and I am pretty sure I am officially the worst blogger on the planet. I am not going to say that I will attempt to be a better blogger this year, because I know I won't, it is not healthy to try to set unrealistic expectations for yourself. I am however happy to say that I officially started 2012 out no longer single. Yes that's right the unhappily single mom found someone to date. So we will see where this takes us, so far so good, lets keep our fingers crossed. I will do my best to keep you updated. Happy New Year to you all, and I hope this new year brings you as many of life's joys as possible!

Jealousy

I am not a huge fan of Mothers Day. Wait that is not true, I am grateful on this day that I am a mother of two absolutely wonderful, beautiful little girls. I am so proud that I got chosen to raise these blessings. I hope that I always show them the love and compassion that I never got as a child, or even now as an adult. I hope they never feel that I don't think they are good enough or pretty enough or that if they do one little thing wrong that I love them anyless. I will never lock them out or tell them they are stupid. I will never judge them if they have a few more pounds than what I think they should have. I will give them proper freedom and not keep them from having sleep overs. I will not let them be the kids that no one wants to stay with because their mom is so mean and yells all the time. I will not call them names and will not discourage them in whatever adventure they want to partake. On this Mothers Day I have one wish and that is to NOT be like my mother. I am so jealous of everyones post about how wonderful and kind their mothers are, I hate that when everyone else was putting up pics of their moms for Mothers day I feel left out because I don't feel that way about my mom. I wish I had that kind if mom and I pray and hope that my kids look at me as one of those truly exceptional moms that they can consider their best friend. I love you My Maddy Brooke and Magaily Alice, I promise to you on this day to always love you unconditionally.

30

I am 30. Not only is that depressing enough by itself I am 30 and single. At first I was ok with the idea of it, now not so much. Don't get me wrong I do love my single status and I don't really mind bring 30 so much but the combination of them together just sounds kind of depressing. Oh well like I said this is the year to do something about it, so my birthday wish find someone worth my time before hitting the big 3-1! Wish me luck!

Bad Blogger/Guilty Pleasures

Yes I admit it, I started out strong, but I am a bad blogger. I have not taken the time to actually get on the computer in forever. I suck I know. I am however back now. Not only am I am back I am going to admit to you a guilty pleasure of mine. I like to steal my kids Nintendo DS and sit in the bathtub and play games. My new favorite, well actually its an old fav Super Mario Bros.



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Memories





So I don't really have a lot to say, but I have been looking through some old pics and they have really made me smile. It is so fun to go back and sort through old memories. I love seeing the images of my girls growning up and how much they have changed. They were and always will be my sweet little babies.

I remember when Maddy cut Magaily's bangs like this, she said Mommy she couldn't see I was just helping her.

Rock and a hard place.

I have so much going on in my head right now. I cannot even possibly begin to put it down at this very moment. So I am going to be a bad blogger and just give you guys a pic that has some of my favs. Best friend I need you!



Janis

So today on my 30 day challenge was who would you like to trade places with for the day. I chose Janis Joplin. She had such soul. She was beautiful without trying to be, I love her beatnik style. I love the layers and the jewlrey and messy hair. She is one of my favorite people. I truly feel I was born in the wrong decade. I would have loved to see her in concert. It is a shame she is no longer with us, but I think she always knew she wouldn't be. Here is on of my favorite descriptions of her "The premier white female blues vocalist of the 1960s, who dazzled listeners with her fierce and uninhibited musical style. "1943-1970  I am going to include in this post some of my favorite quotes from Janis. I when you read them you understand why I feel such a connection to her.

"I'm one of those regular weird people."

"If I hold back, I'm no good. I'm no good. I'd rather be good sometimes, than holding back all the time. "

"On stage, I make love to 25,000 different people, then I go home alone. "

"Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got. "

"Audiences like their blues singers to be miserable."

"I'd trade all my tommorows for a single yesterday."

“It's gonna be a long hard drag, but we'll make it."

"I hope you're going to edit this stuff. I don't want to sound like a senile, self-pitying chick babbling on and on about her days of glory."

"I'm a victim of my own insides. There was a time when I wanted to know everything. I read a lot. I guess you'd say I was pretty intellectual. It's odd, I can't remember when it changed. It used to make me very unhappy, all that feeling. I just didn't know what to do with it. But now I've learned how to make feeling work for me. I'm full of emotion and I want a release, and if you're on stage and if it's really working and you've got the audience with you, it's a oneness you feel. I'm into me, plus they're into me, and everything comes together. You're full of it. I don't know, I just want to feel as much as I can, it's what 'soul' is all about."

"People expect Janis Joplin to be a tough bitch, and say I start talking to them like a lonely little girl--that's not in their image of me--they don't see it. Say you meet somebody you've heard about, you don't ever see them, you don't see who they are and who they need to be recognized as, you see who you need them to be."